This one time, in Norwood...

Once upon a time, in a town called Norwood, there was the cutest chubby kitten of them all named JohnJohn. JohnJohn was cute but he was also fierce.

One blustery, snowy day, a chubby pigeon, named Chubby Pigeon, sat down on the birdy kibbler. The wind was blowing wicked hard and stuff was going all over the place but Chubby Pigeon stayed didn't move from the kibbler.

Chubby Pigeon also gave me -- I mean, JohnJohn - stink eye. He dared me to a staring contest. He said, "Hey, Chubby Kat. I bet I can stare at you longer than you can stare at me." And I was like, "Oh, yeah? K. You're on."

We stared at each other for two hours. (Moms timed it.) The wind was blowing totally wicked hard and Chubby Pigeon didn't even budge. (I think I even saw Chippy blow by.) After two hours, he gave up and went away. Dad made me a golden sash (like they wear on Miss America) that said, "Best Starer Ever." I wore it for a day.

The end.

Chubster JDamn - OUT!