Nom Nom Nom

Holla for me, JDarn fans! This is my 100th blog entry! WOOH! Who knew that an eleven-year-old chubby cat would have so much to say. I'm so glad you've joined me today to read this very special entry. Well, all my entries are special but this one - this one raises the roof...literally!

To start the story, I need you to put on your wayback hat. Here is a picture of my pal, Bandit, who, by the way, has been visiting just about every night. Bandit enjoys partaking in sunflower seeds from the squirrel hut that my Uncle Blaine, Aunt Patty, and cousin Mac bought for me for Christmas.

It's a wicked nice squirrel hut but everyone got sassy with it after it was installed for a while. The squirrels figured out how to remove the roof (it was just set on there), so Dads outsmarted them by tying a tight knot that prevented anyone without thumbs from lifting the roof off. When Dads tied the knot, me and Archy applauded him. Dads was "wicked smaht" to solve the problem without resorting to barbed wire or electrocution.

The knot kept the peace. Even Bandit didn't bother with the roof, though he did sometimes scratch his cheeks on the corners. (That has to feel wicked good!) But the squirrel hut started attracting some troublemaker squirrels. See, everyone wanted to eat out of it at the same time and, while Dads gives plenty of squirrel sunflower seeds for everyone to eat in peace, some monkey squirrels wanted to be assertive and make it their territory. One morning, Dads caught a squirrel standing up and peeing on the squirrel hut. PEEING ON THE SQUIRREL HUT.

The peeing squirrel made the porch smell gamey, and he bossed around the other squirrels. With Archy's help, Dads delivered the peeing squirrel a cease and desist notice, telling him that he was no longer welcome on our porch. The squirrel nattered something at Dads, shook his little squirrel fist, and ran off. While unnerving, we all thought the situatation was resolved. Little did we know that it was just the beginning.

At dusk over the weekend, Dads stumbled down to the kitchen, exhausted from a day of construction in the baby's nursery. He looked out the picture window and rubbed his eyes. He looked again. He was shocked. The peeing, cease-and-desist squirrel was back, noshing on the knot to the roof off the squirrel kibble hut. He had chewed through the whole rope. The roof fell off and the peeing squirrel helped himself to food, head first.

Sure, the kibbler was empty, but it was the rude, blatant act of defiance that got under Dads' skin. Then the peeing squirrel had the nerve to show Dads his tushy. RUDE!He then got a little stuck in the kibbler, which made Dads giggle, but he got out ok.A hoodlum friend showed up to investigate. Once he realized that the roof had been razed, he cheered.
Dads ran out of sunflower seeds, and it's been raining lots, so it's just been empty like this for a few days. Dads said he's doing it to punish peeing squirrel but I hope he fills it up soon because staring at an empty squirrel hut does not entertain a cat.

In other news, me and Archy have taken on additional responsibilities for our impending baby brother or sister. The doctors put Moms on bedrest because she's having swelling in only one leg (two legs are ok, one leg is not so good), so she doesn't go to work anymore. She just lays down in bed and we snuggle all day long. I make sure to lie down on any magazine she's trying to read or to keep the remote controls toasty warm under my belly. I am such a good helperbee!!!

JD - OUT!